Part 1 of 1, by Jay Watamaniuk
1. Chicks dig scars…even if they come from banging your head on the dining room table while moving to retrieve your Warhammer miniature that fell on the carpet
2. Enormous amounts of time spent thinking about plans for the zombie apocalypse will see you survive with food, shelter, weapons and, of course, a babe
3. Everyone will turn to you when the aliens finally do invade and speak only in pop-culture metaphors based on learning to communicate via T.V. transmissions
4. You live your life assuming you can do anything provided you get a re-roll
5. When asked, your plans for the weekend could include ‘risking your life to rescue the last remaining heir to the throne from the merciless army of undead’ vs. ‘me and Lonny are going buy a 6-pack and get drunk behind the 7-11. Clutch!’
6. Your casual vocabulary consists of words like obfuscate, celerity, protean, and obtenebration
7. If roleplaying is highly recommended by relationship councilors to add spice to your life then you my friend are a tiny god
8. You win the Halloween costume contest every year at your office. You need not tell anyone you have a closet dedicated to costumes at home
9. You picked your own dump stat and rightly assume you are awesome in everything else
10. You can appreciate the streamlined and compact form of a flirty new rule system with the glossy and enticing exterior cover art but know in your heart that real gaming love comes from the work of sorting through complexity, the compromise of house rules and the appreciation of those priceless and endearing imperfections
Jay Watamaniuk has lived in such faraway and make-believe places like Thailand, Greece and Japan but has always returned back to Edmonton, Canada to put down some roots and to avoid the fricken’ huge insects that lived in those places. He has been BioWare’s Community Manager for over 7 years and has never once- not once- dressed up like a pirate at work. Shameful.